The LeBron James Barbie is selling like hot cakes on StockX, according to Cllct. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good collab and am mostly just upset I didn’t grab one at cost, but if you missed out on the Barbie and don’t want to pay over $150 for one on the secondary market, might I suggest these more reasonably priced LeBron James dolls and crafted goods on Etsy:

• LeBr0n (sic) James Voodoo Doll Parody: the description notes “Don’t like his cockiness? Stick a pin in him” and they literally mean it - each purchase comes with actual pins. I can neither confirm nor deny that Anthony Edwards might have purchased a few of these ahead of the playoffs. 

• LeBron James Space Jame 2 Crochet Doll: you know someone is good at crochet when you look at something and go that looks nothing like the thing you’re saying it is even though you look at it and know exactly what it is - you know what I mean!  

• LeBron James Toilet Paper: literally the most fun thing about this is that according to Etsy this product is sitting “In 10 Carts” which means people are on the fence about whether or not they want that face to…come close to… their stuff. 

• LeBron James Face Pillow: literally would never sleep if this was in my bed. Ever.

• LeBron James Succulent Planter Pot: the jokes write themselves on this one, but it’s super cool looking. I guess just like human hair, plants wither and die. 

• LeBron James as Batman and Robin: this one seems timely because of the debate around “who is the Batman and who is the Robin” between LeBron and Luka Doncic. Here, LeBron is both! Somehow in this scenario everyone wins and everyone loses. 

• LeBron James T-Shirt Disguise: Ok, this is pretty hilarious.  

• Um. 
  

In my journey through Etsy I also came across this person who fake-autographed a card featuring LeBron James, Stephon Curry and Kevin Durant and apparently sold it for $45; it also included a fake COA. He sells 10s of thousands of these fake autographs with fake COAs and insists that they are real - which, of course, the card he says is “real” that he’s selling for $45 sells for over $10,000. 

People call him out in the comments but he insists that these cards are “real” which, sure, they exist as a tangible thing, but he gets thousands and thousands of positive reviews from people he’s scammed. He turns the anger on the buyer and basically says that calling these “fake” is “Facebook fake news” and Etsy just lets this all happen. 

What a time to be alive. 

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While everyone is excited about the Paige Bueckers era of the WNBA, the other player you should have on your radar is Dominique Malonga, who was the second overall pick in the WNBA Draft last week.

At 6 feet, 6 inches Malonga, who is just 19 years old, is already being compared to Victor Wembanyama, which as you know for me is like the perfect carrot-on-a-stick comparison that might empty my bank account. 

Panini Instant already released her first rookie card, which you can find for $7 and likely will reach 10s of thousands on the print run - but my biggest beef is with Sports Illustrated for Kids, who missed on an opportunity to give us a chaser prior to the Draft.  

That would have been the card to grab. 

The other player that might have some sneaky value is the 10th overall pick Ajsa Sivka. Have I ever watched her play? No. Would I feel comfortable saying her name out loud? Nope. 

However, she is also just 19 years old, drafted one spot ahead of Hailey Van Lith to the same Chicago Sun who might have the best collection of young talent in the league. Sivka could play the wing position alongside Angel Reese and Kamilla Cardoso for many years to come and potentially help lead them to a WNBA title.   

How’s that for advice from someone who has seen neither of them play basketball?

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The NBA announced the finalists for the league awards this past week and one of the fun things with the MVP race is that it’s a friendly reminder to not throw away those cards you tucked into a storage box. 

Nikola Jokic was the 41st pick in the 2014 NBA Draft, Giannis Antetokounmpo was the 15th pick in the 2013 draft and Shai Gilgeous-Alexander was the 11th pick in the 2018 draft. 

And even though SGA was fairly highly-regarded coming out of Kentucky, you can tell just how puzzling his ascension was given that Panini totally forgot to even put the “RC” symbol on his rookie card. Probably an oversight as they were printing one billion copies of Luka Doncic’s rookie card. 

If you’re like me, once you get outside of the Top 10 and these players aren’t on the team you PC, you start to think about “making room” in the collection, if you know what I mean. 

Now, maybe, this is that friendly reminder to reconsider. 

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These Cactus Jack Topps cards released at Wrestlemania 41 look super cool. I don’t know enough about wrestling to tell you whether or not the juice is worth the squeeze on them but man they look really slick. 

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A woman named Bunny who has a massive collection of toy bunnies is selling her bunnies for a lot of money. If you’re a toy bunny collector, hop to it. 

She says she doesn’t regret turning down £10K for one of her prized bunnies years ago, even though now it might fetch her only £4K (apparently bear markets impact the bunny market, too). As a lesson to young collectors, sometimes when you get an offer that seems too good to be true, it’s often best to g-rabbit. 

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Hope everyone got their Topps Now Snow White cards in the mail this week. Know this: those 3,000+ of us who bought that card may be crazy, but… no, that’s all. We’re crazy. Should we start a group on Mantel?