Published January 17, 2026 | By Alyx E, Founder of Collectors MD

Active addiction rarely stays in the lane we try to keep it in. It doesn’t just live in the apps, the bets, the breaks, or the packs. It has a way of following us home. It sits at the dinner table. It shows up in our tone, our patience, our energy, and our availability to the people we love most.

One of the most painful parts of compulsive behavior isn’t the financial damage or even the losses, it’s the distance it creates between us and the people we care about. It’s the half-listening. The short fuse. The preoccupation. The subtle feeling that even when we’re physically present, we’re not really there.

Urges and triggers have a way of shrinking our world down to a single thought: I need relief right now. And when that happens, everything else – connection, honesty, empathy, and presence – starts to feel secondary. Over time, this can leave our loved ones feeling confused, unimportant, or even replaced by the thing we keep turning back to.

The challenge isn’t just managing the urge itself. It’s recognizing how that moment of disconnection can ripple outward, shaping the emotional climate of our relationships and the trust and stability they were founded upon.

In marriages and relationships, the impact is subtle at first. Missed conversations. Irritability. Emotional withdrawal. Financial tension. Then eventually, erosion of trust. Not because of one big moment, but because of many small ones that slowly add up over time.

For many of us, the shame that comes after acting on an urge makes it even harder to show up. Instead of leaning into support, we isolate. We hide. We try to “fix it ourselves”, which only deepens the disconnect. The result is that the people who want to be closest to us are often the ones who feel the furthest away.

Recovery isn’t just about stopping the behavior, it’s about restoring the relationships with the people in our lives. That means learning to pause when the urge hits. To communicate honestly. To repair where harm has been done. And to let our partners see that the work we’re doing isn’t performative, it’s real, consistent, and rooted in change.

At the end of the day, this isn’t just about collecting, gambling, or spending.
It’s about how we show up for the people we love, and making sure we’re choosing connection over compulsion.

#CollectorsMD
The strongest relationships are built on presence and trust, and recovery is how we return to it.

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Published December 24, 2025 | By Alyx E, Founder of Collectors MD

The holidays have a way of tightening everything at once. Time. Expectations. Emotions. Finances. What’s meant to feel warm and generous can quietly turn into pressure, comparison, and a sense that we are somehow falling behind if we are not spending enough, gifting enough, or showing up in the “right” kind of way.

For many people, this season brings a very specific kind of anxiety around money and spending. There is the pressure to give more than we can afford, to match what others are doing, or to prove we care through purchases instead of presence. For collectors, that pressure can compound quickly. Holiday promotions, countdowns, limited drops, year-end “can’t miss” deals, and urgency-based marketing are everywhere. They tap directly into fear of missing out, nostalgia, and the desire to start the new year with something exciting or validating.

What makes this time especially challenging is that these urges often arrive when we are already emotionally taxed. Stress lowers our defenses. Fatigue makes impulse feel easier than intention. And the narrative becomes convincing: it’s a gift, it’s a deal, it’s once a year, I’ll figure it out later. But stress-based spending almost always comes with a delayed cost. It shows up later as regret, tension, secrecy, or the sinking realization that the momentary relief did not actually solve what we were feeling.

In the middle of all the noise and chaos, it’s easy to react before our wherewithal has a chance to catch up. Those are the moments when slowing down matters most—when finding a bit of calm and balance can meaningfully shape what comes next, not just the moment we’re in.

Getting caught up in these moments does not indicate you are weak. It means you are human. Modern systems are designed to press harder when people are most vulnerable. Awareness is not about restriction. It is about giving yourself room to pause. Room to ask what you actually need right now. Room to recognize when spending is being used as a coping mechanism rather than a choice aligned with your values.

The holidays are also meant to be a time of reflection. A chance to take inventory not just of what we want, but of what we already have. The relationships that held us. The moments that mattered. The fact that we made it through another year, even if it was imperfect, messy, or heavier than expected. Gratitude does not erase struggle, but it can ground us when everything feels loud.

If the season feels overwhelming, slow it down. If the urges feel strong, talk about them. If the pressure feels familiar, you are not alone. There is no prize for spending yourself into stress, and there is no shame in choosing presence, restraint, and self-respect over impulse.

#CollectorsMD
The holidays do not require perfection or excess. They ask us to notice what truly matters and to treat ourselves with the same care we offer others.

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Published December 10, 2025 | By Alyx E, Founder of Collectors MD

Leading a movement like Collectors MD requires a level of consistency that doesn’t always come naturally. The work is steady, often invisible, sometimes exhausting, and rarely thanked in the moment. And yet—there’s a purpose beneath it that pulls me forward every single day.

Today we hosted our second Advisory Board meeting, and the theme that came up over and over again was burnout—how easily it can creep in, how quietly it can take hold, and how important it is to stay aware of the signs before they swallow you whole. It’s a reminder I needed more than I realized. When you’re building something that matters, especially something grounded in service, it becomes incredibly easy to put yourself last.

But this cause is bigger than me. It’s even bigger than Collectors MD. It’s about creating a place where people caught in cycles of compulsion, shame, secrecy, or overwhelm can finally breathe. And if the mission is truly to help as many people as possible, then protecting my own health—my energy, my pace, my ability to keep showing up—has to be part of the work, not something outside of it.

It’s in the late hours of the night—when the world is quiet, the day finally slows down, and that second wind kicks in—that the ideas start pouring out. But there’s a thin line between inspiration and exhaustion. When you burn the midnight oil too often, stretch yourself past empty, and set expectations no one could realistically sustain, you risk trading short-term momentum for long-term burnout.

Consistency matters, but not at the cost of collapse. Sustainability matters, because movements don’t grow from intensity—they grow from steadiness. And self-preservation isn’t selfish; it’s strategic. It’s what allows the work to continue long after the adrenaline fades and the early momentum settles.

This journey has been extremely challenging at times. There are heavy weeks and thankless tasks and long stretches where progress feels slow or quiet. But there’s purpose in the grind, and clarity in the reminder that I don’t need to carry everything at once. I just need to carry what I can today.

And that’s enough.

Because consistency isn’t about pushing harder. It’s about protecting the ability to keep showing up.

#CollectorsMD
To keep serving the mission, I have to protect the person behind it—and that’s the foundation sustainable healing is built on.

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Published October 31, 2025 | By Dayae Kim, LMFT, Collectors MD Referral Network

What Is Impulsivity?
WebMD describes impulsivity as a tendency to act without foresight or much thought. Impulsivity is something all of us have experienced at some point.

When I’ve felt burnout from work, I’ve noticed myself engaging in more impulsive behaviors. For me, it often shows up as careless spending or shopping. The cycle usually looks like this: I feel overwhelmed and frustrated from burnout, I go shopping and buy things I don’t need on a whim, and then later, I look at my bank statement and feel anxious and guilty about how much I’ve spent. That guilt and anxiety lead to more stress, and I start the cycle all over again.

Has this happened to you? Maybe it’s not impulsive shopping, but have you ever noticed yourself engaging in any of these behaviors when stressed or anxious?

• Angry outbursts

• Speaking before thinking

• Unsafe or risky actions

• Overspending

• Gambling

When we’re anxious or stressed, impulsive actions can feel like a quick fix. We might think, “If I just buy this, eat this, or say this, I’ll feel better”. And for a brief moment, it might even seem to work. But shortly after, we’re often left feeling worse because we haven’t actually addressed the root cause of what’s happening underneath.

How Impulsivity Can Be A Symptom, Not The Problem
I’ve been working with a client who has struggled with impulsive gambling. When life and work stressors pile up, he turns to gambling to escape. The temporary rush of excitement numbs the stress, but after acting impulsively, he ends up losing money and feeling even more anxious and defeated.

In our sessions, we’ve worked together to identify his triggers and what his impulsive behaviors look like in real time. More importantly, we’ve practiced delaying his impulsive desires through what I call “thought-breaking activities”. For him, that includes taking a cold shower, going for a run or walk, or turning on his favorite music—loud enough to shift his mood and energy.

These activities don’t erase the stress, but they help him slow down long enough to choose a healthier response instead of reacting irrationally. Over time, he’s learned that managing his impulsivity isn’t about willpower—it’s about awareness, delay, and replacement with something more grounding and appropriate.

Where Collecting Fits In
For many in our community, impulsivity shows up in collecting—especially during moments of stress. A new product drops, a live break starts buzzing, or a rare card appears at a “can’t miss” price, and suddenly the urge feels urgent and justified. The purchase or rip offers a brief lift, but the aftermath—budget strain, shame, or hiding transactions—reinforces the same stress that triggered the behavior. If this sounds familiar, try applying the same thought-breaking approach before you buy: step away for ten minutes, review your budget or want-list, text a trusted friend, or play a song that reliably changes your state. These small pauses create just enough space to return to intentional collecting—choices aligned with your values, limits, and longer-term goals.

Moving Toward Mindful Choices
Impulsivity often gives us the illusion of control—a quick fix to escape discomfort or stress. But these reactions rarely soothe what’s truly underneath. When we learn to pause and observe what’s driving the impulse, we open the door to real change.

Noticing the urge is the first step; choosing differently is the second. Even taking 10 seconds to breathe, walk away, or check in with yourself can interrupt an impulsive cycle and shift your emotional state. With time and support, those pauses add up to more mindful, intentional choices—ones that align with who you actually want to be.

Ready To Break The Cycle?
If you’ve noticed impulsive behaviors showing up when you’re stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed, you’re not alone. These behaviors aren’t signs of weakness—they’re signals that something deeper needs your attention and care.

If you or someone you know struggles with impulsivity or the anxiety that often fuels it, I can help. Together, we can:

• Identify triggers and emotional patterns

• Strengthen emotional regulation

• Build healthier coping tools that support real, lasting change

If you are ready to break the cycle and create a calmer, more intentional way of responding to life’s stressors, you’re always welcome to schedule a consultation with me.

#CollectorsMD
Choose pauses over purchases—let intention lead the next move.

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